faq

Why did you start this tumblr?

Well, for a few years now I’ve been thinking a lot about this one time Curt Schilling was accused of having fake-bloodied his sock during the World Series. The bloody sock is in Cooperstown but someone suggested during an interview that the blood wasn’t real. So what did Curt Schilling do?

What?

As it turned out, he had a blog, it was called 38 Pitches. And he went on his blog, and he said, you know, that’s real blood. Go to Cooperstown and check it. I’ll give you a blood sample.

Anyway, I thought: If someone ever accuses me of having bloodied my sock with ketchup, I’ll start a blog like Curt Schilling did.

Someone accused you of that?

No. But some Gawker commenter accused me of drinking $3.50 lattes. Now, I’ve taken a lot of shit since my book came out. I’ve been accused of all sorts of things. Some of those things are true. Some, not so much. But this is just beyond the pale. I don’t even know what a fucking latte is. Much less have I ever had one to drink. Much less for three dollars and fifty cents!

Are you serious?

Yes I’m serious.

You couldn’t look it up? What’s in a latte, I mean?

But then I’d know what it was! I’m just saying. I mean, I suspect it’s like espresso plus milk. Is that what it is? And it’s not like I’ve never had an expensive drink. I mean, in the past couple of years. Not in my twenties. But once I turned thirty, I would once in a while have a frappucinno.

Look. The point is, are these people kidding me? People: Are you kidding me? Do you know anything about me? Have you read my book?

Of course you haven’t read my book.

OK, have you read *anything* I’ve written?

Of course you haven’t read anything I’ve written.

So let’s get this straight. You are going to accuse me of sipping lattes and claim to be downtrodden American proletarians——in the comments section of Gawker? A gossip website for New York media profesionals?

Are you joking?

OK, next question.

Why else did you start this blog?

Well, also I’ve seen some really interesting reactions to the book online that I’d like to address. And this seems like a reasonable way to do it.

Why not do it at n+1?

I’m not sure the n+1 readership wants to be dragged through the mud like this. Besides, by the time n+1 got off its ass to actually set up a tumblr—I mean, we’d have to have a board meeting, then an editorial board meeting, then we’d have to write up minutes (I would, actually, as the secretary), and then we’d have to send out emails, and—-well, in short, by the time this all happened I would be a lot less angry, and this wouldn’t be any fun.

Does setting up this tumblr maybe suggest that you’ve lost your mind?

Yeah, well. Maybe.

  1. alesh reblogged this from keithgessen and added:
    From keithgessen's “faq”: Anyways, I stumbled across this because Rex mentioned something, and — well, you can figure...